Katrina asked: Do you guys do daily devotions together? If so, what do you do? Daily readings? From a book?
(This is John, the husband)
That’s easy – nope. But let me explain. We have relations together, laugh together, cook together, read books together, et cetera, et cetera, all things we do together because we are devoted to one another. So, in a broad figurative sense, yes, we have devotions together. But my gut tells me the question in question is really do you read the Bible together? Nope, we don’t.
Now I’m sure this is because we’re really not a spiritual couple or truly saved or I’m not leading like a good promise-keeper should or some such hogsnot; we’ve heard at least as much from speakers at the mike and authors on the page, as if reading the Bible together is an imperative for a marriage God smiles upon. We’ve tried it, but it would always peter out because it just wasn’t natural. Now if you and your spouse have devotions/read the Bible together, please hear me say that’s great! But as for me and my spouse, it has always felt forced, like David trying to wear Saul’s armor. You can do it, but I’m not sure how much is accomplished. We will share things with one another or our kids that we’ve heard or sensed in our individual wrestling matches with the Word, but as to sitting down together, with a Bible between us and two Bic pins all poised and ready, and the Point of Grace cd playing in the background? No.
That’s easy – nope. But let me explain. We have relations together, laugh together, cook together, read books together, et cetera, et cetera, all things we do together because we are devoted to one another. So, in a broad figurative sense, yes, we have devotions together. But my gut tells me the question in question is really do you read the Bible together? Nope, we don’t.
Now I’m sure this is because we’re really not a spiritual couple or truly saved or I’m not leading like a good promise-keeper should or some such hogsnot; we’ve heard at least as much from speakers at the mike and authors on the page, as if reading the Bible together is an imperative for a marriage God smiles upon. We’ve tried it, but it would always peter out because it just wasn’t natural. Now if you and your spouse have devotions/read the Bible together, please hear me say that’s great! But as for me and my spouse, it has always felt forced, like David trying to wear Saul’s armor. You can do it, but I’m not sure how much is accomplished. We will share things with one another or our kids that we’ve heard or sensed in our individual wrestling matches with the Word, but as to sitting down together, with a Bible between us and two Bic pins all poised and ready, and the Point of Grace cd playing in the background? No.
(This is Meredith)
Um, yeah, I agree with everything John said. Having devotions together feels like just another box to check in the "righteous living" column, and I threw legalism and checking boxes out the window years ago. Some of you might be wondering if we pray together? Do mealtimes count? Yeah, we do, but not with any regularity. It's more of an "as a situation arises" kind of thing.
If you're clueless about this Wedded Wednesday stuff, or if you want to throw a question in the hat, click here.
16 comments:
Love the picture for today's post!! I am still chuckling from John's comment about the bible, pens and Point of Grace CD. Love it!!!!! And I love your Wedded Wednesdays!
I agree- We have tried but it does feel like David in Saul's Armor!!
It is also hard when your husband travels- we have tried over the phone....yeah right....read a bible while driving a truck down the road!!
I am in LOVE with the series...keep them coming!!
Do love the picture- and the Movie!
"Point of Grace cd playing in the background"... Especially funny given the OBU connection. :)
My first thought was, "Phew." :)
We've tried praying together/ devotions nightly in the past and it always felt forced. Glad to hear you feel the same!
I can only echo the "phew" feeling others have given. And, a hardy AMEN to throwing out legalism and checking the boxes--I think that is the main reason that it doesn't work for us. It is just much more natural for us to have our time and discuss as things come up.
Thanks for the series!!
Thanks for answering that question...I was REALLY hoping you would answer my other question I had first though. All well...I'll stay posted to see if you do...
The reason for this question was that I thought I was missing out when I see all those "couple devotionals" out there.
Thanks for taking time to do this...
I love your honesty, and hearing you say you threw out legalism!
I've loved all your posts recently both yours and John's. In a word I find the REFRESHING! Thanks for writing in such a way that we aren't put in a box but rather encouraged to walk in freedom and grace.
I just love you guys. You are so real and don't have these ridiculous expectations that I know my husband and I will never live up to. I get so much more out of the moments or situations that come up between us that involve God or when I learn something on my own and share it with him that way!
I LOVE THIS!
It does feel legalistic and all about the "supposed to's of a healthy marriage." Kirk and I don't do devotions together either...and I can let myself feel like we aren't spiritual enough and all that other garbage...but I just have to know that we are OKAY.
Thanks for sharing!
i'm glad to hear it. my husband has never been on board with devotions together and i felt like we were failing somehow. he prefers to study alone. and so do i. so why was i trying to force it?
I totally agree!
We do talk about things that the Lord highlights to us. And we do pray together when a special need arises, but no 'set' times.
I can't get over how much I actually adore these posts. I think there's a grand chance you're on to something with this series, and wouldn't be surprise if this grew into something far bigger than you anticipated when you started ;)
xo
Agree with HisGirl.
Also, thank you for being happy for those for whom devotionals together work. And for releasing those of us for whom they don't. Loving God is as individual as the individual. I imagine devotionals are, too. Lurve what you said about sharing daily stuff together as a devotional.
I LOVE it! I always hated feeling like we were walking outside God's path if we didn't do Bible studies together. I am so sick of legalism ruling Christian lives. Or should I say ruining?
Loved this post! Can you explain how you moved into grace based living!?! I grew up in a VERY extreme legalistic 'christian' home so I'm trying to grow in this area! Any tips on how you and John became so free from legalism!?!
Thanks!
~ Ali
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